CAMPCHAOS09.

BEST. WEEKEND. EVER.
I don't even know where to begin. Well I guess I can start off with I was at Camp Chaos this weekend, and it's honestly crazy. Since I knew CHAOS (our youth group) exsisted I was jumping up and down to be one of the "chaosers", to be one of the teenagers that stand up for Jesus Christ every day because of their undying love for Him. The ones that are basically a family of amazing teenagers. And just a couple days ago I got to go to Camp Wartburg with all of them, I am FINALLY OLD ENOUGH. And I didn't really realize where I was or what I was doing until Saturday nights devotions. We were outside in the forrest around a camp fire, we sang some praise songs like we had the night before, and our youth director went in front of the fire and talked about our theme for the week. BE DIFFERENT. BE LOVE. And told us just what that meant. And to be honest..lately I haven't felt like I am that close to God, and I have felt distant. Like something is wrong, something was missing, I wasn't doing something right. And then our youth director instructed everyone to write on a card he gave us, something we thought was separating us from God, a guilt that we wanted to get rid of. And on mine I wrote SELFISHNESS. Because I think that is what it boils down to for me, just being selfish. Thinking about me and only me.. thinking about how I feel, and what I want, NOT loving everyone as a Christian.. like our devotion was telling us. So I walked up to the fire and placed my card into the fire, and when I sat back down in my seat and I started crying.. I'm not sure why. I guess it was just the surrealness of all of this. I felt close to God, more then ever. I felt like I had just given myself up, I didn't care. And just the reality that I was HERE. I had made it here, to CHAOS! To the group I have been waiting to be in my whole life, to be with the young adults who I have admired forever. And everything was just falling into place. Being able to just get away this weekend to figure all this out, was incredible. I didn't know God could work in the coolest ways like this. And to know that GOD LOVES ME and is working in me, is so insane. I will never forget this weekend, and the amazing time and feeling I had. And I am trying as hard as I can to be self-less and to love God with my EVERYTHING, and to

BE DIFFERENT. BE LOVE. <3333